17 Comments
May 26, 2023Liked by Alistair Dabbs

> How good are you at maths?

> Better than you. That was 13 questions.

Ah, but I’m the one that always asks the unasked question they don’t want to actually answer so it seemed normal to me until I actually read the 13th answer!

Like:

Why, for all the things you dearly, are you even deploying this there because that’s not the ingress or egress point of the software/service/function.

Aren’t we meant to focus on automating this stuff and not leaving people to have to login, to run a program, to tick a box on every server we build?

As I’ve written down the 6 years steps you need to follow, and given verbally in multiple conference calls, why in the world did you skip steps 1, 2 and 3 and just feel like starting at step 4 so you can now escalate me because it’s not working?

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023Liked by Alistair Dabbs

How IT are you?

A user calls to report a non-working printer. Do you...

(d) Hang up the phone and hope they go away.

(e) Null Reference Exception

(f) Put them on hold until they hang up the phone.

Hey this IS IT support after all

Of course the answer to all of the questions is

(g) Ask ChatGPT because I cannot be arsed to even think about the questions

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May 26, 2023Liked by Alistair Dabbs

Have a look at The Psychopath Test by Jon Ronson if you want to be more worried about how mental health is defined than you already were.

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May 26, 2023Liked by Alistair Dabbs

Are you not more Gronk than Wulf, Mr Dabbs?

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May 27, 2023Liked by Alistair Dabbs

I’m from Canada and I cheerfully admit all of this is completely “foreign” to me. When I heard of “chavs” and “asbos” I thought that was all a harmless, good natured jest, and it is… sort of. Kinda like a good natured concussion one might enjoy receiving from a hearty rugby scrummage.

Here’s what I know about real British society:

https://youtu.be/w09YzTMY1qk

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May 31, 2023Liked by Alistair Dabbs

I'll add "tell them to log a call with buildings management because stationery isn’t your cost centre" to the "answers-to-users advanced generator", thanks for the tip! Sometimes you don't need an AI, random is efficient enough.

And sceptic tank? Luxury!

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